The Crawfish Boxes

I just got off the phone rehasing this game with HLP and I can't find it in myself to think hard on it anymore.  Here's a Mad Lib for you guys to work on:

1. Adjective or phrase describing the Astros
2. Adjective relating to something average
3. Adverb or phrase containing an adverb relating to something tragically comical
4. Adjective relating to someone despondent
5. Adverb describing anger or resentment
6. Adjective or phrase relating to a short period of time
7. Adjective or phrase describing people who have hope for no reason
8. Adjective describing something large or something slow (bonus points if you use one that hits both)
9. Adjective or phrase describing something futile

Yet again, a Houston 1)________  Astros's starter was tagged for run(s) in the first and that was all the Cardinals needed to secure their victory.  After that, the pitching did their job, but the offense couldn't be compelled to overcome a seemingly 2)__________ deficit.  Not only could they not over come this deficit, but their 3)_________ struggles caused 4)_________ Astros fans to shake their fists 5) __________ at the baseball gods and ask "Why?"

Things looked promising for a 6)__________ in the top of the ninth when Carlos Lee cranked a fliner that bounced off the wall in center field.  However, once 7)__________ Astros fans realized that 8) ________ Carlos Lee was running the bases, their 9)__________ hopes were quickly dispelled as there was no chance that Lee could stretch a triple out of his legs.  Per the script, nothing came from the offense and so yet again the Astros drop another game in St. Louis by one run.

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